Stressed!!!!

Wow...3 days in a row. i can't believe it. I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks. I dont' know why I think I actually have time to do this today. I still have 30 reviews and 5 applications to get done by next Thurday and I have the TIERS assignments due this Friday but I am so stressed right now that I better get it all out before I explode. On top of all of the reviws and other assignments, I have to work Radio Shack tonight, I still have a team assignment, a PowerPoint, an individual assignment and a final left for my classes. Tyler and Brandon have rock concert on Thursday night and have to be at school Friday morning at 6:00am to load for Lubbock competition trip. Tyler's application for TexPrep is due Friday at UTPB and Kendall and I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. On top of all that, we got a new bed for Kendall's room and when we started to set it up last night we realized our son is a hoarding nasty pig. I knew the room was dirty and I was gonna have to get in there and clean it like I like it but I really had no idea to what extent dirty was. I would have him clean his room and he said he did. When I would step in the room everything would be done. I never checked corners or under beds or anything so I guess it's my fault but for goodness sake he is fixing to turn 13 and should know better. At least I would think. I think it bothers more cause I am so OCD. Neither one of the boys got the OCD from me. They are both more like my brother Shea in a sense that they are layed back and don't really care if they are filthy or not. Maybe it's a boy thing. I'm not sure but I do know that I have had enough. Either it changes or they do not get to participate in anything they want to do. I don't know what's happening. Maybe the headaches are making things seems worse than they really are or maybe things are bad and that's what's causing the headaches. Sometimes I wonder if screaming would do any good.

On a different note, yesterday I was contacted by my first husband's daughter. She is now 16 and driving. We had a nice chat and she asked about the boys. She wondered if it would be okay if she contacted them amd started getting to know them. I am not sure what to do on this. I tink it's sad for the boys that they have many half-siblings that they know nothing about. They know about the biological father but only know Wayne as their dad. Since Wayne adopted then, they know they have a brother and a sister when actually they have more blood siblings they don't know about. I just don't know if they are ready for it right now. I don't know that I want him back in their lives either. Raelee said that he had really changed a lot but if he hasn't is he just gonna mess with their heads and step out of their lives again? That leaves me to deal with all of the hurt, sorrow and hatred again. This time it would be worse cause they would remember this and I would be the one left to deal with it. I don't know, He hasn't ask to come back into their lives but if Raelee wants in should I expect it? Wow...after reading my own blog, I can see why I am so stressed!!! Maybe work will take my mind off of everything!!!! LOL